(Hobby) Horsey Horsey don’t you stop or Cada loco con su tema
Place the following items on a scale of 0 to 10 according to whether you consider them to be BAD or GOOD. (0 = extremely bad and 10 = the canine’s testicles)
Happy
Sad
Beautiful
Ugly
Delicious
Disgusting
Mean
Generous
Helpful
Selfish
Cuddly Andrex (Scottex in Spain) Golden Retriever puppy
Cockroach
White
Black
Alive
Dead
We all need an identity, even if it’s a negative one.
Children perceive who they are and learn to create and assimilate their identity on the basis of interaction, initially with a parent (figure) and thereafter with siblings, relatives, other children, teachers, classmates, workmates, and bosses, etc.
They see themselves as intelligent, stupid, pretty, ugly, an angel or a devil and then hang on to that identity in order to feel secure. It is better to be "ugly" (a culturally determined characteristic) than not to be anything at all. Not being anything means occupying the psychological and emotional limbo of non-existence.
Then comes a search for confirmation of that identity in other relationships, transference and so forth and the tendency to make the same mistakes over and over again. This involves an unconscious selling of the self and image. I therefore hanker after your endorsement of my identity. e.g. I think I am an ugly bastard and so manipulate you into overtly or covertly telling or suggesting to me that I am indeed an ugly bastard. Should you contradict me and tell me I am beautiful, I criticise your judgement and assume that it and, therefore, you lack validity.
The Spanish expression Cada loco con su tema means that people have their own obsessive hobby horses, lines of conversation, thought pattern loops and favourite subjects of conversation.
When I was a teenager, Great Uncle Stan once cornered me at a large family get-together and talked for a long time about chimney flues, with which he had worked for the greater part of his life. I was not interested however and so escaped and went to do something else. Later on, he got hold of me again and renewed his banging on about flues. What confirmation was he seeking? What do I look for?
The positive side is that identity can be deconstructed and a person with a supposedly negative personality trait (an aggressive person, for example) can, with enough self-awareness (and that’s the tricky part), actually choose whether or not to be aggressive.
Although identity is very complicated and its roots may lurk in the depths of the unconscious, simple acceptance that I am- or anyone else is - an ugly bastard (or even an incredibly attractive one for that matter), in the knowledge that this identity is like leaves on a tree and not the life-force of the tree itself, is just a cop-out.
Place the following items on a scale of 0 to 10 according to whether you consider them to be BAD or GOOD. (0 = extremely bad and 10 = the canine’s testicles)
Happy
Sad
Beautiful
Ugly
Delicious
Disgusting
Mean
Generous
Helpful
Selfish
Cuddly Andrex (Scottex in Spain) Golden Retriever puppy
Cockroach
White
Black
Alive
Dead
We all need an identity, even if it’s a negative one.
Children perceive who they are and learn to create and assimilate their identity on the basis of interaction, initially with a parent (figure) and thereafter with siblings, relatives, other children, teachers, classmates, workmates, and bosses, etc.
They see themselves as intelligent, stupid, pretty, ugly, an angel or a devil and then hang on to that identity in order to feel secure. It is better to be "ugly" (a culturally determined characteristic) than not to be anything at all. Not being anything means occupying the psychological and emotional limbo of non-existence.
Then comes a search for confirmation of that identity in other relationships, transference and so forth and the tendency to make the same mistakes over and over again. This involves an unconscious selling of the self and image. I therefore hanker after your endorsement of my identity. e.g. I think I am an ugly bastard and so manipulate you into overtly or covertly telling or suggesting to me that I am indeed an ugly bastard. Should you contradict me and tell me I am beautiful, I criticise your judgement and assume that it and, therefore, you lack validity.
The Spanish expression Cada loco con su tema means that people have their own obsessive hobby horses, lines of conversation, thought pattern loops and favourite subjects of conversation.
When I was a teenager, Great Uncle Stan once cornered me at a large family get-together and talked for a long time about chimney flues, with which he had worked for the greater part of his life. I was not interested however and so escaped and went to do something else. Later on, he got hold of me again and renewed his banging on about flues. What confirmation was he seeking? What do I look for?
The positive side is that identity can be deconstructed and a person with a supposedly negative personality trait (an aggressive person, for example) can, with enough self-awareness (and that’s the tricky part), actually choose whether or not to be aggressive.
Although identity is very complicated and its roots may lurk in the depths of the unconscious, simple acceptance that I am- or anyone else is - an ugly bastard (or even an incredibly attractive one for that matter), in the knowledge that this identity is like leaves on a tree and not the life-force of the tree itself, is just a cop-out.
posted by Bob at 2:56 pm
6 Comments:
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My judgement is poor; I lack validity. I say nothing about you.
This may make you someone.
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Not someone called Rob, obviously. My apologies for confusing you with my son.
Easily done - there's only one letter difference.
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